Plants on the Window
 
Plants on the Window
 
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Esther Tan                and Dr. Ruth Van Reken

Special thanks to Ruth for being instrumental in making this resource a reality, through sharing her gifts of deep processing and conceptualization, wealth of transitional life stories, and her heart for all who identifies as cross-cultural or third culture individuals.

 

Featuring: Interview Video - Who is a TCK?
From the author of the Encyclopedic TCK book:

Third Culture Kids-Growing up among worlds (David Pollock, Ruth Van Reken, and Michael Pollock)

 

Viewing Gallery:
An Overview of the TCK Story

A plethora of video resources on TCKs & TCAs: 6 Mini Video Interviews with Dr Ruth Van Reken to provide an overview of understanding the TCK context

Interview with Ruth Van Reken
Interview with Ruth Van Reken
Interview with Ruth Van Reken
Interview with Ruth Van Reken
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How are TCKs poised for career development in times like this?
 

Departure Lounge: Research for The Practitioner

Easy-to-use research nuggets for your carry-on bag

Third Culture Kids (TCKs) & Third Culture Adults(TCAs) - Early-life influences on social connectedness, emotional well-being, and perfectionism

Presented at Families in Global Transition Conference 2019, Esther Tan, April, 2019

Kids Running
Outdoor Business Meeting

Are former TCKs the ideal candidate for  business expatriates?

Research of Selmer & Lam, 2004

Confused or multicultural: Third culture individual's cultural identity

Moore and Barker, 2012

Fall Tokens
Wheat Field

Homecoming and re-entry issues

A consensual qualitative investigation into the repatriation experiences

of young adult, missionary kids.

Key points from:
Lynette H. Bikosa*, Julia Kochelevab, David Kinga , Glenna C. Changb, Anne McKenzieb, Chris Roenickeb, Victoria Campbellb and Katrina Eckardb

 

Transit Lounge: Resources for Third Culture Kids and Adults

Liminality applies to all TCKs mentioned here. Liminality is the concept of being in-between. If you are curious about what liminality is, you can read more at an upcoming article.

Page selections of resources: "If I am a....."
Missionary Kid or Missionary
Business Kid or Expatriate
Military Kid or Veteran
International students' Kids or International student

 
Man overlooking skyline

Feeling at home at the airport, when moving and traveling?

The Terminal:
Research Reflections from TCK and TCA Researcher

Along the journey of TCK research

Poppy Field

Perspectives of Human Development - TCKs' Sense of Loss from Reciprocity with People, Places, Nature, Objects as They Move

August 10, 2019

In interviewing an adult TCK on the multiple connections she had in different countries growing up, she described this well: “Though I feel grateful that I feel like I have two homes that I feel a sense of belonging for (America and India), I also miss one when I am in the other.” There is a conflicting sense of loss and missing out wherever she is specifically located. She explained that it is hard for her to say goodbyes, as to her, there is a unique dynamic that is created only when the particular two persons comes together in a relationship—this is reciprocity explained.


Unbeknownst to TCKs, the located-reciprocal parts of their core selves can be buried or hidden when they adapt to new places. In order to fit in and be understood, they often engage in the process of deliberate code-switching (e.g., languages or cultural norms) that they lose those parts of who they are ‘reciprocated’ in the previous contexts they lived in. This naturally leads to identity confusion or deep sense of losses for TCKs when they do not feel a sense of connectedness to particular places or cultures that they are expected to feel connected to. I have come to see that explanation of identity confusion could be approached from using the reciprocating self concept, that the confusion is due to the loss of an identity inspired when the self interacts with these places, culture, objects, and people who belonged to places they have left behind. Somehow, people, and TCKs, have difficulty accessing certain parts of their core selves, which could be consciously or unconsciously suppressed, when they are no longer in those physical spaces.


For TCKs, frequent relocation processes can create significant hidden losses and unresolved grief, which were concepts discussed in Pollock and Van Reken (2000). The grief of TCKs is complex and remains unresolved for years mainly because they were hidden, and difficult to articulate. I would add on to propose that hidden losses are intangible losses which could stem from losing the ability to access to who they are when TCKs are no longer in those locations of their significant memories. That is why, it is so life-giving when TCKs meet other third culture individuals, they connect so well via a shared third culture-ness. I believe, TCKs find themselves being able to be in touch with who they are again, when they meet people or see places, objects that resembles what they miss, helping them recover and relive those intangible parts of their core selves again.

Rocks of Balance

Holding on to tangible objects to access the intangibles - treasured memories and meaning

9 August 2019

I love this story, where a TCK shared how she had a collection of rocks from all the places she has ever lived in. She explained that these rocks represented an avenue for her to have something tangible to hold on to to relate to her intangible memories of moving.

Her story perfectly illustrated how inanimate objects generates reciprocal, symbolic meaning that serve as a ‘holding space’ for TCKs to bridge their high-mobility experiences across time and space. This concrete yet transcendent holding space is especially important for humans, as we have bioneurological limitations with memory functions that fade over time, especially with multiple interferences of new memories.

 
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In such a time as this... in 2020...

...in the uncertain times of COVID-19
or stressful cross-cultural transitions filled with ambiguity...

Sharing more resources through my recent blog posts on the Thrive Center of Human Development.

 
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How do I help my children to cope?
~ Understanding your child's BASIC pH  Coping-resiliency styles ~

April 2020 #Resilience#Coping Styles#Children

https://thethrivecenter.org/helping-kids-develop-coping-strategies/

The 6 Coping-Resiliency Styles (BASIC-pH): 

(B) Belief 

(A) Affect 

(S) Social

(I) Imagination

(C) Cognitive

(Ph) Physical

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June 2020 #TCKs#Purpose#Spirituality

Waves

July 2020
#Thriving#Spirituality#Anchoring

https://thethrivecenter.org/finding-anchoring-rituals-in-times-like-covid-19/

Creating an intentional anchoring ritual for thriving and resilience

  1. Make space for positivity by stopping the things that bring negativity in your life (e.g., reading the news).

  2. Re-focus your thoughts on truths. These thoughts will re-direct your emotions and behaviors.

  3. Stay grounded with your values, feelings, and body senses.

  4. Find practices that anchor your core being, such as deep breathing, watching nature, and listening to calming music. You might want to recall instances from past memories of what has helped you reached deep reflection.

  5. Stay connected with those closest to you.

  6. Stay directed by reflecting on who you have been and are still becoming. How has your purpose helped you during these difficult times?

Arrival Lounge: News & Resources

More resources for your checked bag

Families in Global Transition (FIGT) Community

Online Forum: 
What are the hidden losses of TCKs? Stories from Asia

How are TCKs poised to thrive in Careers in such times?

Online Forum:
Third Culture Kids and Families Ties

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FIGT Annual Conference,
March 13-15, 2020

Aug 24, 2019

9th Nov 2019: 5pm (Los Angeles) 10th Nov: 9am (Singapore)


Organized by TCKs of Asia
Speaker: Esther Tan & Guest speaker: Dr. Ruth Van Reken

A 15-min video resource with tips for TCKs on their career development. 


If you would like to have further career discussions with career coaches, please feel free to email me.

Registration at: tiny.cc/ask7dz
Another event organized by TCKs of Asia

 

Summary of resources shared on this site for Educators, Therapists, Coaches, Trainers and TCKs

About the Educational Resources

Overview of TCKs: Definitions & Key Questions

Understanding TCKs - Teaching Slides

Understanding the TCK experience: What are the hidden losses of TCKs?

Research Nuggets (layman summary) for Practitioners

Connections to Researchers for your practice

The Terminal: Reflections from TCK Researcher & Contact

How are TCKs poised to thrive in their careers? 

 

Contact Me

Thanks for your interest in my research and the resources. Get in touch with any questions or comments regarding your thoughts on this topic. I’d love to hear from you.

Thanks for submitting!

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 About

This website is created to connect people who are interested in teaching, learning, discussing or researching about living and thriving in a life filled with cross-cultural navigations and transitions. This website aims to be helpful for anyone who might be a Third culture kid or adult, or a cross-culture kid or adult, or just someone who is interested in these conversations. This website will feature more videos, resources and authentic stories from TCK/TCA gurus, TCK/TCA researchers, or TCKs/TCAs, with hopes of providing more open spaces eventually for those who are Eastern, Southern, South-East Asian, or who have lived in East, South, and South-East Asia.

bridgineer profile in my StrengthsFinder assessment, this website serves a similar core role of a bridgineer, to bridge people to information and key resources, to bridge people with people.


Please feel free to chat using the chat box, connect via email, or share how or who you might like to be connected with. 

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